Geographobia

Skippy, not having Geography GCSE is not an excuse for not knowing that Iceland is part of Scandinavia. It makes you sound so uninformed you could be a Republican Vice-Presidential candidate.

Is plastic lucky?

Dave, if you say 'touch wood' and then touch plastic (Not even plastic that looks like wood. Just plastic.), I don't think it works. Sorry...

Discretion is sometimes the better part of being a colleague

Skippy, when you hear that a co-worker's little brother has just been hospitalized, maybe don't tell her that the condition he is being tested for is exceedingly painful and it will take at least 6 months for him to recover. That may well be true, but you don't need to beat her over the head with it...

Skippy, pull your shirt back down

Just because you're pregnant doesn't mean that it's appropriate to show your belly in the workplace.

I am not a resource centre

Skippy and Ermentrude - while I think that it's lovely that you respect my superior knowledge and skills so much, but please, if there's something you don't know, why not try to find out for yourself before asking me? When the answer is going to on either Wikipedia or on a Windows Help Menu, why not use them, instead of me? Exactly how unhelpful do I have to be before you stop asking me STUPID QUESTIONS?!

Not really, no.

Skippy: You know when you're writing something, and you just think 'God, this is so...'

 

Unfortunately Skip, if you don't finish your sentences, I have no idea what you're talking about.

Party of the century

Skippy, I think it's great that you enjoyed your birthday (and that I got out of going to your party), but please could you now SHUT UP ABOUT IT. I am really busy, and I think you are too. Come on girl, it's business time not gossip time. GET ON WITH IT!